How to Define a Coachable Moment
- Sean Evans Moore
- May 11, 2017
- 2 min read
Professional coaching is a structured conversation that allows the person(s) being coached to gain clarity around their desired outcomes. They then self-select their actions in order to achieve their desired results. Organizations are increasingly utilizing both individual and team coaching to improve performance and drive toward results. As more and more professionals get exposed to coaching, I am seeing more leaders and managers adapting the coaching process into their “tool belts.”
As a professional coach it is exciting for me to see such enthusiasm for the practice! There is one issue that needs clarity: it is my belief that coaching is NOT a simple conversation where you ask a few questions, give advice from your world of experience and expertise, and expect the person to act. As I listen to many professionals who use coaching as a tool in developing others (direct reports or colleagues), I’m struck by how often their conversations end with, “Go do X.” From my perspective this is more of a mentoring/boss conversation and NOT a coaching conversation. So if you are not a professional coach, when do you use coaching?
First, you need to determine if it is a coachable moment. Coaching is not a silver bullet. I recently observed a client practice coaching; it illustrated for me how important it is to define a coachable moment. It is too easy to fall into thinking: “If I simply ask questions, it will result in clarity and/or actions for my employee.” The employee was seeking advice and wanted direction, not clarity. As the conversation progressed the employee got visibly more frustrated with each question. I witnessed anxiety; she acted as if she was being challenged to have the ‘right’ answer. She was put into a corner because her typical answer was: “I don’t know.” The conversation did not move toward clarity around the employee’s desired outcomes. It resulted in more uncertainty. Then my client was frustrated and reverted to giving advice and direction. Oddly this is what the employee was seeking in the first place.
To avoid this frustrating situation, here are a few basic questions to help you define a coachable moment:
1.) Are you ready to put aside your own agenda and your role as a boss or colleague?
2.) Will you suspend judgement and advice-giving for the whole conversation?
3.) Is the person open to seeking his/her own thinking around solutions or another direction?
4.) Are you willing to accept the actions chosen by the person being coached?
5.) Can you offer follow up support without personally taking on any action items?
If your answers to any of these questions is ‘no’ or ‘maybe’, this is probably not a coachable moment. Step back and seek the role that best fits within the context of the conversation and what the person is seeking. Sometime you need to be the boss! Other times you need to be the coach who reflects back the other person’s thinking, so they can get clarity on what actions to take next. Continue to practice coaching and looking for ‘coachable moments’ that provide the beginning of meaningful connections and movement toward their desired outcomes and results.
